Most recently, since I've moved into my not so new townhouse, I've had a couple of neighbours on one side and the same neighbour on the other. The couple who have been here with us the whole time seem quite nice. They have barricaded their backyards with tall trees, shrubbery and lattice fencing to ensure nobody, us included, can see in. I find this perfectly normal. They have a cute little terrier dog, who actually only barks when she is outside, so its nice for the most part. Either that, or he has insulated his walls on the inside to mask "Sparkie's" barking. The dog wants to be a rooster, so we can always tell when its time to wake up too which is an added bonus. We hardly talk, so being the quiet guy that I am, works great for me.
On the other side to me was a friendly elderly couple. We share "doors", meaning they can see our back door and vice-versa. Any time I'd come home, the husband would be outside watering his lawn or flora which adorned his townhouse. He was religious about watering, minimum 4 to 5 times per day, for multiple hours at a time. He would personally see to it that every plant on his yard, and all 6 neighbours, had plenty of watering done. If there was a chain-smoking for waterers, this guy was the winner. He was a German fellow, and his English was not great, but we could always tell his intentions, as he walked around everywhere with his water jug looking to feed some plant. We would snarl at me any time we did NOT water our lawn at the same time as him. When we looked across the backyards of all the tenants, you could always tell which yard was his - his grass was green, plush, consistent. The rest looked like typical yards with patches of green and brown, odd shaped divots etc. I called him the "Water Nazi", in a polite way of course.
The Water Nazi moved away (likely to some pasture somewhere
which he could turn into Central Park), but his place was sold very quickly. I would learn that the new couple were also retirees, and the husband used to work for NATO. He would tell me crazy stories of espionage, hanging upside-down to retrieve prized gems, avoiding hidden laser beams....oh, that was Mission Impossible. Well that was what I was thinking, as he was telling he of his ventures to countries I've never heard of. But it was not his past career that makes him different. Nope, instead its that I think he's a peeping tom. He loves looking into our windows. Its kind of creepy. He's also one of those "always seems to be there" kind of people, meaning, the minute I go into the back yard, whammo, he comes out to chat. Now I can only talk for so long, especially if I'm BBQing or something, but he magically always pops up. I'd be driving into the garage, and there he is, waving. I go to pick up the newspaper, and he's there to hand it to me - ok not literally, but he's always out there. If I had higher fences, I would call him Wilson.
I have no idea why I get so many unique neighbours. Chances are as you are reading this, you might think that is perfectly normal. To me, living next to porn freaks, slutty sportscasters, wife beaters, water nazis, Fort Knox and Lookie-Lous is just another day too. I wonder what they all refer to me as?
On the other side to me was a friendly elderly couple. We share "doors", meaning they can see our back door and vice-versa. Any time I'd come home, the husband would be outside watering his lawn or flora which adorned his townhouse. He was religious about watering, minimum 4 to 5 times per day, for multiple hours at a time. He would personally see to it that every plant on his yard, and all 6 neighbours, had plenty of watering done. If there was a chain-smoking for waterers, this guy was the winner. He was a German fellow, and his English was not great, but we could always tell his intentions, as he walked around everywhere with his water jug looking to feed some plant. We would snarl at me any time we did NOT water our lawn at the same time as him. When we looked across the backyards of all the tenants, you could always tell which yard was his - his grass was green, plush, consistent. The rest looked like typical yards with patches of green and brown, odd shaped divots etc. I called him the "Water Nazi", in a polite way of course.
The Water Nazi moved away (likely to some pasture somewhere
which he could turn into Central Park), but his place was sold very quickly. I would learn that the new couple were also retirees, and the husband used to work for NATO. He would tell me crazy stories of espionage, hanging upside-down to retrieve prized gems, avoiding hidden laser beams....oh, that was Mission Impossible. Well that was what I was thinking, as he was telling he of his ventures to countries I've never heard of. But it was not his past career that makes him different. Nope, instead its that I think he's a peeping tom. He loves looking into our windows. Its kind of creepy. He's also one of those "always seems to be there" kind of people, meaning, the minute I go into the back yard, whammo, he comes out to chat. Now I can only talk for so long, especially if I'm BBQing or something, but he magically always pops up. I'd be driving into the garage, and there he is, waving. I go to pick up the newspaper, and he's there to hand it to me - ok not literally, but he's always out there. If I had higher fences, I would call him Wilson.I have no idea why I get so many unique neighbours. Chances are as you are reading this, you might think that is perfectly normal. To me, living next to porn freaks, slutty sportscasters, wife beaters, water nazis, Fort Knox and Lookie-Lous is just another day too. I wonder what they all refer to me as?
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